I sought the Lord, and He answered me;
He delivered me from all my fears.
-Psalm 34:4
I can honestly say that there are so many moments on so many days I do not seek the Lord. I worry, I ask my friends for advice, I try to muster my own way through in my own strength with my own understanding. I know that’s the opposite of this verse, and I know that when I get in that, “I GOT THIS!” mode, I’m often not operating from a very healthy place. I’m usually letting fear motivate and drive me, and worry takes the wheel, and I’m off on some endeavor that is going to stress me out and it almost never ends in peace. I never get to the end of a day where I’ve worried about something a lot and think, “Man, I feel so much better about this.”
I’m continuing to learn the beauty of letting my stress, my worry, my fear, my exhaustion, my lack of wisdom or understanding, and my frustration all pour out before the Lord. He can handle our questions, our doubts, our hurt, our mistakes, our questions, our confession, our emotion… He can handle all of us, and I must say that I am usually so relieved when I finally bring whatever it is I’ve been lugging around to the foot of the cross. It’s a place to rest, to get perspective, to realize and remember that we are not ever bearing our burdens alone.
I’ve heard it said that anxiety or worry comes when we imagine the future without God in it, and this resonates with me deeply. If I can simply seek the Lord, bring my mess into His merciful and loving presence, then my perspective usually starts to shift. I remember I’m His. I remember I’m loved. I remember I can make mistakes and say I’m sorry, and get up and try again only to be met by mercy and grace and love. I can let go of so many things that I’ve been trying to control because I remember that I’m in His hands. And I may not have outright/clear answers like I want or hope for every time, but I have a hand to hold, a shoulder to cry on, a place to rest, and a reason to sing because of who Jesus is and what he has done for me.
Lord, help me to seek you always, and thank you that when I look into Your face, fear begins to take a back seat, and Love takes the wheel. (Cue the early 2000’s Carrie Underwood hit “Jesus Take the Wheel” right here).
